susan at the bmv

Susan: For a while, I was going to go all e.e. cummings and totally stop capitalizing my name so that people would recognize me as susan sade instead of Susan Sade. It's like, capitalization is for commoners. The common people need the capital letters to prove to themselves that they're special. Like, okay you're a proper noun now. Whatever. By like not capitalizing your name though, it's like you're saying "Yeah, I'm just a lowkey noun. I don't need to prove to everyone that I'm important." And like, because of that, you are so important. Like sooo important. Like when Oprah goes to Costco. Or like when Ryan Gosling does anything, ever. It's like, wow. You know? But anyways, then I decided that signing my name in all lower case was too hard. I mean, hello, I've only been practicing my autograph since age 7, it's not like I can change it now. So that's why I need to legally change my name again.