Friday, August 19, 2011

#ideasthatshouldworkbutdontwork

Alice, on her new diet method: So, I just eat one giant meal every two days. Like yesterday I literally ate a 72 oz steak and a pound of strawberries. And then it basically sits in my digestive system for like 30 hours so I'll be hungry again tomorrow. And I think it'll totally work because I got my inspiration from an all-natural source! You know how pythons only eat a rat every three weeks? It's basically the same thing. And, I mean pythons are basically all muscle! I emailed Gwyneth Paltrow about it too. It's totally going to be the newest craze when she talks about it in her GOOP newsletter.

Mary: Gwyneth Paltrow sucks.

Alice: Gwyneth Paltrow is a size zero.

Mary: Gwyneth Paltrow is fat.

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