I know it's been a long time since we've talked. But I know I've said a lot of things to you in the past and I think I still care about you. I just got wrapped up in other things for a month or two (tumblr, cellphone photography, twitter). It's my fault, I just didn't want you to be offended.
The above is an apology to this bloggy and also a very short paraphrase of an apology I once received that started out with "I know you're in Turkey being all international and shit." Cute!
As of 9:26 pm on today, July 18, I am more or less off the map of the social media road map with the exception of this blog and email. This is due to me leaving my phone charger in New York (this makes me sound like a socialite, and I like it), me deleting my Facebook because it represents a contrived facade of me (this makes me sound like a self-proclaimed hipster, and I like it as well), this is also due to Twitter being a little betch and not loading on my computer (this is suburban teenage girl me complaining about my #whitegirlproblems and #firstworldproblems, which I also like).
This also means that my readership on this blog has probably severely diminished. . .which I once would care about, but now I am DGAFing like crazy (for those who are 21st century acronym impaired, that means Don't Give a Fuck).
However I do believe that it is still important for me to keep blogging onward, as this is the only exercise I'm getting in terms of English. And also the only exercise I'm getting in terms of exercise. . .how many calories do you burn from 10 minutes of typing? Probably not enough to burn off the sweet potato mashed potatoes I just forced myself to eat.
I think I just need to come to terms with the fact that I hate sweet potatoes. I'm trying to think about why I hate them. . .probably because they are not savory.
Except now I am reading up on all the health benefits of sweet potatoes . . .and maybe I do like them. Oh no! This is how indecisive I am! I will probably die one day because of indecisiveness!
Maybe I should stop treating sweet potatoes like they are potatoes and embrace them in a new light. Except they are gross? But they are full of beta carotene! But they are gross. This is the dilemma. Welcome to my head. I'm sure indecisiveness to this extent is also why Sylvia Plath put her head in an oven.
This is not to say that I am suicidal. It was a joke. One of those jokes you don't laugh at, but rather revel in the inappropriate levity of the joke in your head. Kind of like those horrible Edward Gorey books about ways that tiny children die. You are quietly LOLing on one side of your brain, but the other side of your brain is on the verge of vomming and also noting how horribly unfunny the entire thing is. If you are interested in reading an alphabet book about the deaths of young children (which I was. . .it is very well illustrated! And a short read!) you can find The Gashlycrumb Tinies here!
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