Animal Edition!!!! Yaysiessssss

1. Honeybees
    You guys, I cannot overstate just how ballin honeybees are. Actually, as a digression (because I do that a lot. . .let's be honest), for all my chick flick buffs out there, I just remembered that the cheerleading squad in the movie The Hot Chick was named the Honeybees. But anyways, honeybees, despite the fact that they can be hella scary (hello, stingers?) are so cool, they make Betty White look like a pair of Juicy Couture sweatpants, aka the epitome of uncool. And we all know that Little Miss Fuckin Betty White is like the icon for 2010 because of Snickers and SNL, so that's just a comparison so that you guys can fully realize what you're missing out on by hatin on bees. Which you probs do, because we all do, because when those little bastards buzz around your ponytail when you're about to bite into a delicious turkey sandwich at a picnic, you just wanna bust a cap up someone's ass, amirite?
     Anyways, honey bees make honey. While it's true that I as an individual actually avoid honey (much like I avoid all things sticky and sweet; aka gum that people stick to the bottom of desks, little girls with lollipops and Madonna) for some reason that is beyond my grasp of understanding, the rest of the world population seems to really enjoy it. And it is pretty cool--honey is one of the only foods that doesn't spoil, King Tut ate it,  it has anti-bacterial properties, it's good for beautiful skin, it has antioxidants, it can lower cholesterol, etc. But even more than honey, honeybees are so cool because they can FUCKIN DETECT LANDMINES! Yaaa trick ya.
    I could continue, but really that's all that I was excited about. Also, the bees are dying. Save the bees.

(Except I don't actually know if you can because it's a combo fungus/virus that's killing them, and it's not like we can just dump chicken soup into their hives to make them feel better. Pray for them.)

2. Vampire Squid!!!!
          Yeah these are cool too. . .they aren't really as vicious as they sound though. I know, major letdown. But while they are no Edward Cullen, they do shoot out mucus with millions of glowing orbs in it in order to hypnotize their potential predators and escape. It's like their own way of saying "Suck on that, bitches! Ink is for octopussies." No wonder why they got such a badass name.




3. Yeti Crab
     Yes, I found this in the same place I found the Vampire Squid. All I'm saying is that this is the trendy motha fuckin Mary Kate Olsen of crabs cause its bony little ass (exoskeleton, but still) hopped right on the furry train introduced at Chanel's Fall 2010 Ready-to-Wear collection.